Twinkle Twinkle...

Here we are Monday. All weekend images flashed in my mind, like a movie playing in fast forward and stuck on replay. Mason, you are everywhere. I can still hear your last mumbled word, "Chick" for chicken nuggets that you could not even swallow without choking. Hanging from the living room wall, I am mesmerized from the Sumatran Tiger. It's picture is powerful as it reminds us of Mason's wisdom, bravery and strength he bestowed each day. And your last watercolor painting, how I wish I could watch as you painted each colorful tree watching... as the colors ran together. Wondering what you were thinking as you painted there reflections. Wishing more than ever I would have asked you this or done that. Just one more time at the McDonald's drive thru to see your smile as you sip a chocolate shake, would you like a new flavor? We move in every direction these days; too afraid to slow down. But trying to be brave for those moments when time stands still. Waiting and listening for a sign to tug me in the right direction. Holding strong for Maverick and Ally. Maverick described the weekend just right, "I felt I was," Off leash" I immediately knew what he meant. It is that sense of being out of control and having your emotions tugged so hard and it does not matter what you do!! It is wanting something so bad, but you can't turn back the pages. Even Twinkle Twinkle Star has a new tune, "Twinkle Twinkle, "Mason" Star how we wonder how you are, up above the star so high, you are a diamond in the sky."Twinkle Twinkle "Mason" Star how we miss you, oh so far." As we closed our eyes, Ally proudly requests, "I want the Easter bunny to bring a "REAL" red airplane- to fly up to Heaven and see Mason. When I try to explain, she kept saying, "A real one mom and a really super fast one like rocket." What a wish... Airplanes is playing in my head, Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars. I know why some stars twinkle and others do not.